Potty Training HELL

I know its time.
I started trying a few weeks ago, I would put some shorts on Stewie without a diaper and he would complain when he felt "HOT" down there... so I knew he peed.

I thought that would entice him to tell me before hand so he could use the potty.
He's used it a few times, here and there, but not without me sitting him on it for a half hour at a time until it comes out.

Today I decided to just do the underwear, and I figured, just one time he pees and it will be all over and the next time he will tell me he wants to go on the potty before he wets himself again. but according to him, its alot funner to pee himself several times, get my awesome reaction, and laugh about it.

I know its basically only day 1 in the official race to potty train my 2 1/2 year old son. But this ONE day has basically driven me to want to run away. How do you mothers do it? He peed on the coffee table twice, the rug once, then sat on the potty til i got more underwear, then peed when he stood up.....

Its like its a little ha ha joke to him.
But hes gonna be 3 in November. Most boys are trained by now right? Or am I doing this all wrong? One friend says Im not trying hard enough, one says let him tell you when hes ready. But I ask him everyday if hes gonna use the underwear and potty today and he says "nope, diaper mama!"
I had to actually force it today, and all I get in return, is spot shot all over myself and the carpet, a pissy windexed coffee table, a load of laundry, and a HAPPY DIAPERED child, oh and my headache...
Did I mention my husband just called and said he wouldnt be home til almost 7 tonight?

sigh.....

Is it OK that he's two and....

Stewie refuses to be potty trained, although he LOVES running around holding his underwear.

He's two and a half, and still needs bodily contact until he falls asleep for naps and bedtime.

He can't eat cereal with milk, it has to be dry.. or else the milk would end up on his head....

Around other babies, hes gotta be holding on to me, just in case they get too close or try and touch him. (He was never as curious as other babies are about other babies)

He's my permanent wedgie, when Daddy isnt around.

I get lots of "Jen he will be 10 and you will still be feeding him. He will still hide behind you around strangers. He will still need to hold mommy's hand to fall asleep."

If I wasnt having another unplanned baby so soon, none of this would be weighing on me so heavily. But now Im starting to wonder. Is my son too much of a baby, for me to be having another one in August?

Is he going to be ok?

Emotions

Ive always been loud and one to express my every emotion to anyone who would listen.
Ive always been emotional in every way.

Except, I dont believe quite so much now that I am in my third trimester of pregnancy with this baby.
I cant even watch my soaps without crying during about half of each one. My son thinks Im going insane.
Other than the constant tears, I get angry worse than before. Which is bad enough because Ive always been the disciplinarian in my family when it comes to my son.

You would think Stewie would be scared outta his mind of me lately, but I think he likes getting getting me over excited. I think he likes it waaaaaay too much.

Party in the Park

Yesterday we went to my best friend's daughter's third birthday party.

It was a beautiful day in the park and the kids got to plant their own flowers in little pots.

Very cute.

I got her daughter a Disney Princess dance pad thingie. I hope she likes it. Shes very into princess stuff. She IS a princess. Very calm quiet and ladylike little girl. My daughter will not be like that. I am not a calm, quiet, ladylike mama. Thats usually what it takes right??

Its probably my own fault my son is loud, obnoxious, and kinda mean. I scream more than he does!!!

Well yesterday was my first day sporting my new blondish (ok orange) hair... I am thinkin I will change it in a few days, but everyone says they like it.. I think they are being nice.....

27 Weeks

I feel her all the time. It doesnt matter what Im doing, shes moving.
Sometimes after one of her quick naps I feel her stretching. Like one part of her is touching up here and the other down there.

I never felt Stewie move quite this much.
Maybe because I quit all my anti depressants with this pregnancy.

I dont know why I did that. I really resented being pregnant again from the start. We used protection every single time. I hated being pregnant the first time, and this time I had morning sickness until about 4 weeks ago.

Shes so real to me now. It scares me. Until recently I still called her "it" even though Ive known it was a girl for months.
I go through all the baby clothes I get from friends and family and it makes me cry. Not because Im happy. I dont know when or if that will come. I cry because its too much. Too real. I already have my baby.